I wonder how much time had passed between Ammon’s encounter
with the king and when Aaron got there. How long had the king been thinking
about Ammon’s generosity, as he put it. It’s interesting how loving people
makes all the difference, even in the hardest cases. The king literally tried
to kill Ammon, and destroy every good thing he had just worked so hard for, and
even in that moment Ammon was able to respond with love. On the other hand, he
didn’t let the king overpower him or Lamoni. He maintained his boundaries, but
was no more separating that was right or necessary. I think that is hard to do in my life: To set
the boundary and then love right up to it. But that is what we are supposed to
do, and it is what softened the king’s heart.
Whatever the king’s faults up to this point, when he says if
thou sayest there is a God I will believe it is an amazing declaration of trust
and faith. It’s that kind of doubtlessness that is so difficult for me. What
allows him to do that? Is it just a choice he makes, or a spiritual gift he
has?
When Aaron saw that the king we would believe, then he told
him the whole gospel plan. How is this important for missionary work? I suppose
it means it is okay, and right, to have conversations with just little pieces
of truth, instead of thinking it needs to be the whole big shebang.
Today as I was listening to A&G as I took the kids to
school, I was thinking about capitalism, and taking care of the poor, and
having everything equal like they talk about in the Book of Mormon. There is a
morality to working hard and doing all you can for yourself, but I know there
is a balance with sharing your blessings and not worrying that you “deserve”
more but worrying about what people need. And I do believe that it has to be a
choice to share, and there is balance. It is hard for me to get my head around,
and always has been. What things is it okay for us to have—a nice house, or
just adequate shelter. If I had a cheaper house I could help more people with
the money I saved. Is it okay to buy decorations, or eat out, or even nice
food. As I read King Lamoni’s response I think it is about my heart. I think it
is okay to have things, but I can’t love them more than people. So if there was
ever a time the Spirit told me to help someone, or to give up something that we
have, I would be willing and happy to do it. The Lord didn’t ask the king to
give up half his kingdom for salvation—but he does ask for our heart. That is
what the king was really offering when he said it, wholly and completely, with
nothing help back. That is what I need to feel and work on with my material
things, with my everything. I need to get to the point where there is no time
or talent or possession I wouldn’t gratefully give to help Him in His work.
I wonder why when the Lord was working with the people at
this time they kept passing out, Alma the younger, King Lamoni and his wife,
now the king. Was it something in their culture that made this a more
meaningful way of learning? Or was it to increase the faith of those around
them?
Why were the servants afraid of Aaron? Had they felt the
Spirit and knew God was with him? Would the queen and the whole house have
listened and been converted without the drama first?
Why did Mormon launch into the geography of the land in the
middle of his story? Did he just realize he had left it out? It strikes me that
there is a lot to learn from the way the Nephites defended themselves by
keeping there enemy on one side of them and creating one small defensible
border between them. For example, in our homes, we keep Satan out and then
closely monitor the few places he could potentially enter, like the tv and
internet.
