Alma 7

Alma talks about how when Christ comes he suffers pains and afflictions and temptations of every kind to take upon himself the pain and sickness of his people. When I need access to the atonement for repentance I know how that works. I have learned the steps and understand the cleansing. I am not sure how to participate in the atonement when it isn’t repentance but other spiritual and physical pain. I know the Lord can, if it be right and according to His will, take those pains from me, but I don’t know how that works. Do I just ask? Or does it come different ways, like through answered prayers, and prayers I don’t even know to pray, through priesthood blessings, or is that how we heal just through the passage of time or with the help of other people. Is the atonement always what makes emotional healing possible whether we realize that or not?

He knows how to succor me. Most of my pain is fear, taking me away from faith. He tells me, as I ponder this, that if I just keep my eyes on him I will be okay and conquer the fear. That is what I am going to try to do as I walk this stormy sea, is keep my eyes on him, press forward with faith, and now that He will catch me when I fear and fall. Because he loves me.

He felt my fear and my hurt and my pain. He knows exactly what it is. And when I don’t know why or how to name what is happening, I know that he has felt my bewilderment and completely understands it, but knows the answers, too. I just have to rely on Him.

When Alma entreats the people to be humble and submissive and gentle and long-suffering, I know those are the things I struggle with. And even as I read it, I feel my pride rebel against it. I am grateful the Lord, in His infinite patience, reminds me over and over again that I need to conquer my pride, and conquer myself.

Alma 7