Monday, December 21, 2015

Alma 44:1-15

At first I could see a parallel between the Lamenites killing the Nephites because of their faith in Christ and what ISIS and other terror groups are doing in the world now. Except the thing that is different is that ISIS isn’t just trying to destroy our faith, but make everyone believe what they believe. Did the Lamenites have any religion? Did they believe anything? And if not, what about the Nephites believing made them so angry? Especially when they lived in separate lands, it seems like it wouldn’t have really affected them. I wonder if the fact that it was their king that converted and left to the Nephites made them so much angrier.  I guess, is it really that different from all the times we get mad about things just because we think they are stupid. Our family really does that a lot, where things that seem dumb are worth hating. The Lamenites thought the Nephite beliefs were stupid, and that made them angry. It makes me think about Christ talking about the higher law, where anger is like murder. (Which is really hard for me to hear when I spend so much time in my life angry, especially at people I would never want to hurt let alone kill).
I was actually thinking about this at church yesterday, how attitude affects an experience so much. Why is it so hard for my family to just not be cynical about things? It is always easy to find things to criticize and mock, but I know that when I look at a situation from outside of it, we are missing out on opportunities for joy. Is it a vulnerability issue? We just don’t “lean in” to the experiences that are happening, but remain aloof and apart to some extent. And because that is the culture we have built in our family, it is really difficult to change.
In either The Crucible of Doubt or The God Who Weeps, the Givens talk about how our agency is full in this life, and belief is completely a matter of choice. Moroni and Zarahemna could both look at the situation and find entirely different explanations, Moroni attributing his army’s success to God and Zarahemna seeing it as only due to their cunning and armor. They talk in the book about how in this world the arguments for or against belief are equally persuasive, which is what gives us the real option to choose, and our choice ends up being based on who we are at the deepest level. That idea was very freeing to me. My choice to believe doesn’t have to be based on disproving the arguments for not believing. I get to make a choice between the options.
It is interesting to me, however, that Zarahemna didn’t just lie and make the oath he didn’t intend to keep. I noticed that years ago when reading about Nephi trusting Zoram as soon as he made an oath to stay with them. Was it just a more honest time? I feel like I hardy trust anyone now. Is that me, or is this somehow a different time or culture?
It also took a lot of honor and courage for Moroni to not back down when Zarahemna rejected his offer. War is awful now, and I am sure was awful then. I know they had to have been anxious to end the conflict, but he stuck to what he had said. I have been working on sticking to my word with kids since I received that impression so strongly a little while ago. And this section feels like a re-affirmation of how important that is. Again, I feel like I need to carefully consider my words before I talk and then stick to them, even though sometimes it is very hard to see them sad about consequences. I need to give them that structure, but also to be a woman of honor, who is known to do what she says she will do.

It is interesting that once their leader fled many of the Lamenites were willing to throw down their weapons and make the covenant of peace. Isaiah and I were talking about that from the Book of Mormon this morning, how Mosiah didn’t want the people to have a king anymore because of the damage a wicked leader can do. It is something to remember more carefully as a mother, and in other leadership positions. If I am leading us astray, that is a big responsibility. I need to be more mindful and deliberate in the decisions and make and the things I say.

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