Alma 34:18-41

I am really confused by prayer. Alma is talking about praying about all of your life, and asking for diving intervention and prosperity. But then my understanding of prayer has been that it is really about coming to know God’s will, and conforming myself to it. I don’t’ quite know how to get my head around it. And when people don’t pray, and they prosper in a worldly sense, is that still coming from God? I know everything comes from Him, I just don’t understand the relationship with prayer. Maybe it is just to keep us remembering that it all really does come from Him. Asking for help is a way of remembering and being grateful?

And then Alma tells us that praying doesn’t do us any good if we don’t take care of each other and have charity. It reminds me of Debb’s talk yesterday, about how the only true way to check our level of discipleship is how we think about other people—if we see them as Christ does, and children of God, and love them. Is Alma’s point here really about true religion? Praying is supposed to bring us closer to God, but if we only talk to Him, and then do nothing good, we aren’t really progressing. He talks about praying to ask for mercy and salvation. Salvation is really repentance, and changing our natures. It seems like the point is focusing on loving people as the thrust or point of that change. We still have to be participants in the work of building ourselves by choosing to act in love to the people around us everywhere.

Sometimes it feels like anything short of Mother Theresa’s vow of poverty and lifetime of continuous service is the only acceptable path. I know it can’t be, but I can’t feel the balance.

I love that in verse 31 Alma is very clear that as soon as you repent and soften your heart the plan of redemption works immediately in your life. The idea of already being saved is so comforting and important, and so often lost.

I also love his talk about why repenting after you die doesn’t work. You will still be yourself, and repentance is change. It is a slow and hard process. Who you are in the moment you die is still who you are wherever you Spirit goes, and if I have been stubborn and prideful, and that has kept me from repenting, I will still feel the same. It is so hard to change, and the more progress I can make now, the happier I will be now, and the happier I will be then.

In verse 36 it stands out to me as important that the righteous in the kingdom of God are those whose garments are made white in the blood of the Lamb. It isn’t because of the perfection they have personally obtained, it is because they are in the covenant and holding on to Him. Sometimes, okay, a lot, I feel like I am more righteous than others, but that can never be the case. I am just as dependent on the Savior’s grace as anyone else. It is only my pride that ever tells me otherwise.

His call to “humble yourselves even to the dust, and worship God, in whatsoever place ye may be in, in spirit and in truth; and that ye live in thanksgiving daily, for the many mercies and blessings which he doth bestow upon you” feels like a very personal invitation. I want to be more humble and grateful and worshipful. I know that is what I need. And then he tells us to have patience, and bear with all manner of afflictions. Pride, impatience, whining…. So many things I need to do better. This reminds me of the challenge not to complain for a day. I felt like I needed to do it, and I am grateful for the reminder.

Alma 34:18-41